Get Rid Of Stress In 7 Days Or Less With Tar’Lese Rideaux | 640

 

There is no doubt that we live in a stressful world. We are humans, and that is something we have to accept. We can’t have pure rainbows and butterflies, but we can learn how to adapt, adjust, and recreate our fate. What can we do to manage our stress, feel at peace, and be happy, no matter the chaos swirling around us? Today, Tar’Lese Rideaux gives us great tools to make that happen. Tar’Lese is a holistic stress management coach that helps stressed-out professionals find more fun and profits in their businesses. She teaches and inspires others to get rid of stress in 7 days or less. What are things that are worth your time and what are not? What’s working for you and what’s not? In this episode, she joins Chris Miles to share deep insights on freeing up space in your mental bandwidth, focusing on yourself, and eliminating things that destroy your inner peace.

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Get Rid Of Stress In 7 Days Or Less With Tar’Lese Rideaux

This show is for you and about you who worked so hard for your money and want your money to start working harder for you now. You want that freedom, cashflow and prosperity now, not 30 or 40 billion years from now, but right now so you can live that life that you love with those you love. Most importantly, it’s not just about being rich. It’s about enriching the lives of others because as you’re blessed financially, you can create a greater ripple effect in the lives of those around you. 

That’s exactly what I’m here to do. Thank you for allowing me to have this platform share and create a ripple effect in your lives. Thank you for binge-ing, sharing, and tuning in. You have been amazing. As a reminder, go to our website, MoneyRipples.com. If you haven’t done so already, check out the Passive Income Calculator. If you’re curious to know how much passive income you could create in 2023, you got to check it out. Go ahead and try that out.

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I’ve got a special guest here that I’ve been waiting to get on here for a little while. Good things come to those who wait. That’s what we’re looking at here. I have Tar’Lese here with us. If you don’t know who she is, she’s a holistic stress management coach. She has helped professionals have more fun and more profits in their business, which we all love. As a founder of Body Brains Bank Account, her genius lies in the ability to teach and inspire others and get rid of stress in as little as seven days. How awesome would that be, especially in nowadays world?

She has worked with clients all over the world. She has also done this for decades. She has done amazing. She has been featured as a guest in many different ways, shapes and forms. I thought it was time to bring her on too. How many of you guys feel like stress might be one of those things, whether you know it or not? If you think you’re not stressed, you probably are. Unless you’re so chill, that’s not the case. If you’ve ever thought stress might be affecting your life, quality of life, and richness of life, then this is the show for you guys. Tar’Lese, welcome.

Thanks for having me. I’m excited about this conversation. It was funny when I put this message up that I wanted to be on your show when you and I spoke, you said, “What would you talk about? You have a money show. How would this even relate?” I said, “Stress doesn’t discriminate on how much money you have, how old you are, your race, or how you were brought up. It affects us all because we’re human.”

People need to realize that they can have fun and still have a profitable business. Click To Tweet

Whether your show is about money, business or family, you might not notice, but everyone is on edge about whether it’s politics, health, finances or relationships. What I’ve done was I started focusing on stress management several years ago. People were coming to me wanting to bet better in health and wellness. They wanted to get in better shape. They were worried about their mindset and needed someone to give them a pep talk. What I realized was that everyone who was coming to me for their body, brains, and bank accounts was stressed out with something else. It wasn’t the reason they were coming to me.

They were not sleeping at night. They were worried about finances. Maybe they had invested in something that wasn’t working and was affecting their business, their business was affecting their health, and their health was affecting their mindset. It was this rat race happening. A lot of people talk about the rat race financially. A lot of people don’t realize that they’re in a rat race in their own minds. They’re ping-ponging all of these problems instead of putting them out on the table and addressing them. That has been my focus for several years, and it’s pretty cool. It’s fun to help people realize they can have fun and still have a profitable business. You don’t have to have one or the other.

You’ve had a pretty amazing story yourself. I’ve followed you on social media for quite some time. You’ve had to put this into practice. This is not something that’s just theory. It’s not just something that sounds great, but it’s something you’ve had to do.

 

I’ve had some stressful situations. To give you a laundry list, my mom committed suicide. I’ve had a house flood. Both of my cars were lost. Our house was underwater. I’ve had a fire in my house. I’ve had cancer in my eye. My ex-husband had cancer. All of this stuff happened. One of those things might derail people. It was “one bad thing after another.” I had to learn how to deal with it and process it versus stuff it down and power through it.

I had some trial and error, let’s be honest. I’ve had so many great highs, but I have had some lows. I’ve noticed in the business world, some people don’t bounce back as easily. Some people go to drugs and alcohol. Some people would go gambling. For me, I was like, “How can I help these people recalibrate and get back to what makes them happy versus focusing on what’s not working?”

It’s incredible because you’ve had that put into practice. I know that in all of our lives, nothing is perfect. You being able to recover and bounce back so quickly is mind-boggling. It’s so admirable. I’m sure there’s probably some country singer now writing and trying to quickly jot down the notes of the things that happened to you to say, “This is the best country song ever.”

Your pain isn't unique. You’re not the only one who experienced a tragic moment. And when you remember that, it doesn't make you feel as alone and makes you less lonely. Click To Tweet

One thing I bring up often is your pain isn’t unique. I’m not the only one to have lost my mom. I’m not the only one to have had a tragic experience happen. When you remember that, it doesn’t make you feel as alone. It might not be the exact same thing, but there are other people that relate to and understand what’s going on with me. It makes the less lonely. I’ve worked with divorce attorneys, dentists, military veterans, and nurses from the ER in super stressful jobs.

At the end of the day, if you can communicate what’s going on and how you’re feeling and take a different perspective, they realize, “The stuff I’m stressing about is not worth it.” In the bigger scheme of things, this is a little thing. Sometimes, it takes them talking to another person, getting outside their normal bubble, and realizing that there are options. A lot of people don’t think they have options. I’m sure you deal with this in finances. They’re like, “This is the only thing I can do,” and you say, “We could do this and that.” They just don’t see it.

A lot of people will say, “Breathe. Do journaling. Listen to great meditation music.” I’m all for that. You have to get to the bottom of, “Why do I even need this in the first place? Why am I sitting and going, ‘I need to breathe. I need meditation. What’s happening?'” Let’s get to the bottom of that. Once you can uncover that, it’s so much easier from there. It’s fun.

 

I’ve watched it happen in people’s lives. They almost have PTSD. It could be from a divorce or a health situation that makes it worse. It amplifies it more when you have health issues and then you have stress on top of it. It keeps declining your immune system and everything else. I’ve even noticed it in an emotional state. Personally, I noticed when I was married to my ex-wife, my income would go up and down with my emotional state. I would have high months and low months. I was almost like a bipolar. Once I went through that divorce, although it crashed my income for a bit because I was so emotionally overwhelmed, eventually, I was able to clear that out and recover, All of a sudden, my income stabilized and even exponentially increased. You can’t ignore that.

The interesting part is that some people don’t relate the two. They don’t relate, “My income is because I’m stressed out about this. I’m gaining weight because of that.” It’s usually something that happened in the past that they have PTSD from or something that they’re worried about in the future, “Is the stock market going to crash? Is this going to happen?” You’re like, “It could, but in the meantime, let’s be present and focused on what we can control.” When you’re not so worried about what happened or what’s going to, you realize, “At this moment, I’m okay. Things are okay. It’s stressful but it’s not life-threatening.” I’m running that loop in my head and telling myself.

That’s what I had to go through when I went through my financial challenge back in the last recession. When I was going under, I remember thinking, “How am I getting out of this?” At first, I was stubborn. I was like, “I’m going to work my way out of this.” When, all of a sudden, the doors were closing one by one, I felt like I was out of options. I then thought, “Now it’s hopeless.” The thing that got me out eventually was, “At this moment, I’m still here. I’m still alive. I’m paying my bills, even though I was behind on my bills, but it’s not like someone’s taking me out. I’m not going to debtors prison.”

A lot of people don't think they have options when they are dealing with difficult circumstances. But the truth is, there’s always another way. Click To Tweet

Nothing was happening. It was all in my mind. All the worries and everything was in my mind, which also would affect how I show up in business because the more desperate you are, the more you show up with business breath. You show up with desperation that drives away business. You have to work 3 to 4 times harder to make the same income you would if you figure out how to manage that stress and focus on solving your problems.

One of the first thing I tell people is, “We can get over this in a week but it’s going to be a little bit of work every day.” The first thing I ask people is, “What is your why?” It’s like that. Why are you doing this? Who are you doing this for? Is it for you? I’ve worked with thousands of people at this point. What I’ve noticed is it’s usually because they’re doing it for someone else or the legacy that someone else had. It’s like, “I’m a doctor because my aunt and uncle are doctors. I’m doing that,” but they hate being a doctor. They’re Raiders fans because all the generations are, but they don’t like it. Those are the best examples I can use.

When you start to go, “What is my purpose for this?” you would be amazed at how much people go, “I’ve been putting so much pressure on me because of my partner, friends or kids that I’m not doing what I want.” I’m sure that you’ve heard it. People make investments because they get FOMO or something. You’re like, “Are you doing this because you want to? Are you doing this because the people online are talking about it?”

 

You have to throw all that out, be real with yourself, and be willing to look at it from an outside perspective, “This isn’t Tar’Lese talking. Let’s stay on the outside.” When you can take yourself out of the equation, you realize, “Some of the stuff I was stressing about is crazy. This is not worth my time.” The first question is, “Is this something that has to do with you? Is it simply a thing that needs to be communicated with another individual or some boundaries that you need to set with yourself?” You would be amazed at how much stress you can eliminate by setting some boundaries.

There’s no doubt there. That has been one of my issues too. I try to learn and adapt from that. The typical things like meditation, journaling, breathwork, and things like that are great, but for a lot of people, it’s not enough. I’ve seen a lot of people do those things and still can’t emotionally get things in control. What are some things that our audience can do that would help them?

It’s what I mentioned. I would do that. I would sit down and take a few minutes and say, “What do I want to do if all the financial worries and the pressure of setting a certain standard went away?” If you focus on yourself. Write down what that looks like. The second step is you have to do a process of adding and eliminating things. Some people are afraid like, “I don’t want to tell them. I don’t want to go to cocktails every week because that’s what we’ve done since high school.”

Let's be present and focused on what we can control. Click To Tweet

Don’t do it. It has been taken away from you. Let go of that and add something monthly that you can do. You have to look at, “If this is my ideal life and I have my ideal life in front of me, is this what’s currently happening?” If not, you have to add and subtract. It seems simple, but you would be amazed at how people don’t even take the time to go, “What’s the pros and cons list of my life? What’s not working, and what is?”

Once you realize that, you set the steps from there. If I’m getting rid of X, Y and Z, what are the next steps you need to take to do that? It’s not just making a list. It’s taking some action. The simplest thing someone could do now is getting a piece of paper and make it into 4 squares, 2 on the top and 2 on the bottom. First is, “What is immediate? What is something I’m self-sabotaging on and putting on the back burner that I know every day when I wake up, I should be doing but I ignore? Let’s get that done.” Period. Point blank.

The next thing is things that should get done but aren’t fire or an emergency. It can get done but I’m not ignoring it. Here we go. The third is, what can you delegate? I guarantee there are people in your life who would love to help you or would love to take something off your plate or someone you can hire, but you got to get it off your plate and onto theirs. The fourth square is what we are getting rid of. There is some stuff that you keep ignoring and putting on the back burner. It goes from March to June, then June to August, and you’re still talking about it.

 

Get rid of it. Take it off the list. You’ve been procrastinating on it long enough. Let it go. It’s like immediate, let’s get it done, delegate to other people, and get rid of it. When you can look at that and say, “It’s not that difficult. I want to keep this. I don’t want to keep that. Other people can help me. This is what goes away.” It frees up that mental bandwidth for you. Instead of being the computer where the fans are going and having all this stuff, at least you know where things need to be, and at least you have some action steps that you can take. I always do that with people. Your brain dumps a lot.

Get your thoughts out. Getting your thoughts out is great, but what are we doing with those things that are going to help us and not just another list that we’ve gotten out and sat on our desk next week? That’s the problem with the self-development, self-help, stress management, and life coaching arenas. It’s like, “Just go breathe, meditate, ground and walk.” We have to get to why we even feel the need to do that in the first place. Once we can begin to regulate our nervous systems around that and create our new normal, then we can go and participate in meditation and yoga and things. You can’t keep ignoring the root of what’s happening.

You can meditate and breathe all you want, but when you get out of that and all of a sudden, you walk into your same life, nothing changes. It may help your perspective a little bit, but you’re right. It takes me back. I see a few key points that I can relate to as well. Going through a divorce, I was like, “Maybe I should throw away my whole business.” I want to quit everything. It’s the emotional way we go through. I’m like, “I’ll just quit my business. Does somebody care anyways? Nobody will even notice.” I remember getting out of that funk and like, “Let’s rebuild my business conceptually or in my own mind from the ground up.”

Be real with yourself and be willing to look at it from an outside perspective. Click To Tweet

On the outside world, nobody knows anything different, but from the inside, I said, “What should I get rid of?” I remember reading the book The Pumpkin Plan which helped me with that. It is like, “What’s that one big prize-winning pumpkin that I want to put all my effort towards and cut off all the rest of the pumpkins.” I remember saying, “I’m going five-plus hours a week of networking events. I’m going and doing this. I’m trying to speak on stages here and here. What if I did things virtually? What if I stopped going to all these networking events that don’t produce anything for me anyways? What if I cut out this and this?” The next thing I know, I can work 5 to 10 hours a week and make more money than I was working 50 or 60 hours a week just by going for those most productive things.”

Isn’t it amazing? It’s the same concept. When you go, “What’s working? What’s not?” and be willing to take action on it as you did, it’s life-changing for you. A lot of people are willing to make a list. They’re willing to get it out, but when they look at what needs to be done, they’re like, “Nevermind.” We then start that rat race again in our mind, “I’ll do it tomorrow.” When you start continually breaking commitments to yourself, it’s not a good game to play with yourself because it’s like, “What is my normal? What is acceptable?” When you start slipping with what’s acceptable to yourself, you start slipping with what’s acceptable to others. That’s where more stress is at it.

Be mindful of it. I know you are, but for anyone reading, if you catch yourself doing the same thing, figure out what that trigger is. There’s a fine line between self-love and self-sabotage. You are the only person that knows, “Am I doing this because it’s best for me and it’s what I need and what’s in my best interest? Am I doing it because I’m ignoring things, trying to procrastinate or self-sabotaging?” You’re the only person that knows.

Delegate to other people and get rid of things that are just taking up your time but not getting you profit. It just frees up that mental bandwidth for you. Click To Tweet

When you pet yourself on that line, be quick to make a decision, “I noticed this pattern coming up. We’re going to go this way because my why doesn’t include this. We’re going to go on the self-love train this time.” You are the only person that knows this. Once you figure out where your medium and line are, you start to snap out of it quickly. It doesn’t take you seven days. It takes you a couple of minutes to get that muscle memory going.

That’s what it takes us to create those new habits. You’ll want to go back to that old, “What’s comfortable?” That may not be the thing that is serving you.

A comfort zone is a great place to get rid of profits. When you’re running in that comfort zone all the time, that’s a great way to throw all your profits. Get out of it. I laugh about that. I know your story. Sometimes you don’t talk about the stuff that’s happening. You’re not trying to be fake, but you are trying to stay positive and focus on what you want.

Be willing to take action and that would be life changing for you. Click To Tweet

If you are being happy on the outside, putting on your game face, and making it happen, you’re not alone. There are resources and people that can help. If it is breathing or meditation for you, knock yourself out, but I encourage you to get to the bottom of it because it could change your life. It could change the trajectory of your business. Working from a flow is so much more fun than working from fear.

Give us an example, maybe a final story of one of your clients that did this very thing. Maybe they didn’t even realize they were stressed and found out, “My life is completely different now.”

I had someone who went the opposite and went to the brick-and-mortar business when a lot of people were getting out. She was like, “I’m going to teach online courses.” She was not happy. I said, “What do you want to do?” “I want to open a restaurant.” She did it. She opened a restaurant. She had difficulties during COVID. Honestly, she did. She said, “I am so glad that I stopped what everyone else wanted me to do and opened the brick and mortar business anyway. People were telling me not to do it. People were saying that it was a horrible time. I love it. I get to go there.” She’s showing these cupcakes online and people are loving them.

She’s in her creative zone, and she wasn’t before. That’s a scary thing to do in unknown times, but she decided, “I’m not willing to keep allowing the stress of doing something that doesn’t make me whole and happy.” She goes against the advice of every single person and was like, “Look what I did. Check out my cupcakes. This is so cool.” I love it because that’s an example of she figured out what was not working. She added and subtracted. She took that list and implemented it. She delegated to people. She got rid of things. She added and worked it.

Some difficulties came up because we weren’t expecting shutdowns and all this stuff. She’s like, “The lessons that I have learned from going with what I knew I wanted versus everyone else, I can’t even tell you how happy that makes me.” That’s one example. It’s like, “What if?” If it fails, then you learn something. If it doesn’t and you just make this list and go, “What if I just started doing what I want to do? What if I got rid of these things and added these things?” If it doesn’t work out, at least you know. If it does work out, you’re on a different trajectory. Hopefully, the stress is alleviated.

That’s a great point. How many of us feel something and know intuitively we should do something? It’s deep in our gut. Maybe a fleeting thought comes in like, “I should do this,” but we push it out because of all the distractions and everything pulling our attention away versus when we take action on it. I talked to a guy who said, “It’s probably seven times that this idea entered my head. I should go and reach out to this person.” Finally, in December, he did it. He said, “I was one week too late. It costs me millions of dollars just because I didn’t act on that promptly because I was getting my attention pulled in different directions. I was distracted.”

I’ve had some business and relationship failures, but at the end of the day, I’m like, “What a great lesson. I can share these with others.” I’ve been through some crazy stress but now, it’s so fun. I’m doing a big business deal now. Every single other person in this deal is stressed out, and I’m just showing up happy and smiling. They’re like, “I don’t get it.” I’m like, “You don’t understand. I lived this. I don’t just teach this and share it with other people. I lived this. This is me. I know where my stress is coming from. I’ve faced these demons. It doesn’t matter how much money is involved. I got this.” That has become my main mission. It’s to be able to do that for other people. We’re not ignoring it, but we’re figuring out how to navigate it in a more fun way.

Tar’Lese, this has been amazingly valuable for us. If people want to follow you, get to know your stuff, or even reach out to you, what’s the best way they can do that?

All of my social media is @TarLese. My website is TarLese.com. You can find everything there Body Brains Banking Account related. My topics are all over the board and they have been since I’ve been online. That’s why people love me. I figure out how to relate pretty much anything to not stressing and having fun. You’ll find something like that across the board.

I appreciate your time and value, Tar’Lese.

I appreciate you. Thanks for having me on.

Everybody, it’s one thing to try to get in this nice meditative state and be able to try to breathe and do everything else. At the end of the day, if it’s not leading to actual actionable steps and changes, it’s not going to make any changes in real life either. If you want to see results, it’s about taking action. Go ahead and follow Tar’Lese. Go check out TarLese.com. Make it a wonderful and prosperous week. We’ll see you later.

 

Important Links

• Body Brains Bank Account – Facebook
• The Pumpkin Plan
• @TarLese – Instagram
• TarLese.com

 

About Tar’Lese Rideaux

Tar’Lese is a Holistic Stress Management Coach that helps stressed-out professionals find more fun and profits in their businesses.
As the founder of Body. Brains. Bank Account., her genius lies in the ability to teach and inspire others to get rid of stress in 7 days or less.

Tar’Lese has worked with clients across 21 time zones, over almost a decade of coaching.
She has been featured in multiple online publications, blogs, media appearances, and podcasts teaching others how to Turn Adversity Into Assets.